Wednesday, June 19, 2013

Faith During the Pain

Twang!  No, it was more like TWANG!  that was the sensation I felt on the last day of school nearly 3 weeks ago at approximately 10:15 A.M. as I was in the middle of a baseball bat relay during 5th grade field day.  I had just spun around the bat 10 times, and knowing what normally happens next, I just dropped the bat and stayed bent over for a few seconds while the world, and my stomach, stopped spinning.  After 3 or 4 seconds I began the return sprint back to the finish line by standing up, and that's when it happened,  TWANG! went my left calf.  I knew something was wrong immediately, but I hopped back to the finish and went straight to our class's cooler for a bag of ice; my fun and games were over.  As bad as the initial pain was, the more the day drug on, the worse I felt.  When I got home I wrapped it up and started feeling sorry for myself.

I was most upset because in 2 days, I was supposed to be starting a bicycle trip with the youth from my church.  The longer I thought on it the more upset I got, because there was NO WAY I could ride a bike for 20-50 miles if I couldn't walk 100 feet.  I texted Pastor Robbin, who was leading the ride, and told him that he might be down one group leader.  The rest of the evening was spent splitting time with the Ice pack and heating pad.

When I woke the next morning, I spent 30 minutes stretching out my sore leg.  I figure out how to limp with a minimum of pain, wrapped up the swollen appendage in an Ace bandage and prayed a lot.  I spoke to God about my desire to do the trip; after all, I had spent 2 months and a small sum of money preparing for the journey.  There were words asking for help, asking for comfort, and telling Him I needed courage because I had no desire to increase my daily quota of pain any higher than it is normally.

A couple of hours later, after prepping my bike and the girls' bikes, I tried something that seemed totally ridiculous, I went for a ride.  Just walking the bike down the porch stairs hurt terribly, but I had to try to ride.  To my surprise, as I began to turn the pedals the pain in my leg abated.  I rode around the yard, then out on the cul-de-sac out front, then I turned toward the hill up the road and took off for a half mile of no pain.

Back in the yard I dismounted.  Once back in walking mode I was reminded in no uncertain terms that I was injured.  Every step brought a sharp pluck of pain, but I had ridden with no pain.  I made the decision right then that I was going to do the 1st leg of the ride the next day.  I should be able to do 20 miles even though I was hurt.  It was the second day that would bring the real yes or no.  I would either be swollen up and in too much pain to ride the next morning, or I would be the same as I was.  If I was the same, I would go.

Each morning for the next 5 days started and ended the same way; with me asking God for help comfort and courage.  He was faithful the entire time.  I am convinced that God wanted me to go on that bike trip, and I leaned on that in faith knowing that He would make a way for me to ride because it was His will.  I gave each mile up to Him, thanking Him every 5 minutes for the next mile to come.  At the end of each day's ride I was reminded of the pain as soon as I dismounted, but it was the end of that ride and rest awaited me.

I did not do this ride on my own; in my own strength I could never have done it.  It was the strength of God that brought me through.  The next couple of essays will be about the form that His strength took: OJ, MF, NB, CM, JK, KF.

(Yes, it still hurts all the time, some times a lot.  I suppose it will take some time to heal, but I have time, as much time as He sees fit to give me.)


2 Corinthians 12 -    Concerning this I implored the Lord three times that it might leave me. And He has said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.” Most gladly, therefore, I will rather boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may dwell in me. 10 Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.